Post sweater knitting blues

My son Johnny got married Saturday. The culmination of a year-long marathon of planning with a four-day sprint to the end.  My two daughters flew in from the West Coast with their partners, (and the new grandbaby) which was amazing. The wedding itself was a warm and wonderful event full of family and friends, love and laughter, eating, and dancing.  While there are always little mishaps, everything turned out more perfectly than I could have hoped, and in the end, Johnny is happily married to his best friend.

Here at home, though, with my girls gone and the wedding behind me, I am feeling all kinds of things.  Happy, tired, relieved, but also a little emotional.  A little down.  Maybe a lot down.  I understand that this feeling is post-event blues.   Psychotherapist Diane Barth explains.

During exciting events, the body releases hormones–a complicated cocktail of adrenaline and endorphins– that bring on a high. When the event is over, the letdown is both psychological and physical. It can feel like just moments after it started, it was over. Your body immediately stopped producing all of those delicious chemicals that bathed your brain in good feelings, leaving you to let down, disappointed, and blue. Maybe you start to pick apart all of the things that went wrong. It’s part of the let-down. 

I get this same feeling sometimes, albeit to a lesser degree, when I finish a big knitting project.  The project is exciting, and creating the fabric and the garment makes me feel incredible. But somehow when it’s all done and all the ends are woven in and I put it on, I feel a bit down. I am critical of my seaming or some other miniscule aspect noticeable to no one but myself.  I am hypercritical of myself and my work. 

Here’s what Barth recommends: 

• Recognize that these emotions are normal and not an indication that everything is horrible
• Appreciate your accomplishments and the process.  Identify the wins
• Be kind as you acknowledge anything that went wrong.  It probably wasn’t a big deal, and you likely learned something important
• Move on and make plans for future celebrations, achievements, and activities.

This last may be why I like to have multiple projects going at the same time.  When one is done, I can just jump into something on needles and work towards the excitement of the process again.  

I have to remind myself that regardless of what I am feeling, emotions are like clouds.  They are not to be judged, only recognized. They are something over which we have no control, and whether they are happy or sad, they are not permanent. 

For me, writing about it, and knitting boring fabric helps.

I hope your knitting helps with your feelings too. 

Warmly,

Ellen